The Other F- Word

“Women can never have it all”- Is that so?

Being a woman, it is expected of me to oppose the aforementioned quote. Why? Because I am obviously a feminist who believes that women can do everything that men are capable of doing and that too in high heels. I’m not even sure I qualify as a feminist, I don’t think of myself as one, though enough men have tried to insult me by calling me one. To me it seems, that a lot of people think “feminism=anti-men”, while I think of it as “feminism=for-women”.
Yes, it irks me when Honey Singh sings “47 weight kudi da”(and this is only the less misogynistic song amongst the songs he has sung) and even more when people go around in their Bolaros and Pajeros with this song blaring at top volume. People want girls to look like size zero models when they themselves have potbellies (WOW!). This intrinsic hypocrisy in our society hurts me. Why women in the status qou are scrutinised so much and judged by everyone?

Mrs Indra Nooyi, in an interview, said that women can never have it all. If a woman is in corporate field and doing good, people see her as a selfish woman who ignores her family needs for her professional gains and success. She is expected to ignore all opportunities and take care of her house. To add to it, why was such a ruckus made of Smriti Irani’s educational qualifications? Didn’t Kapil Sibbal, a Harvard studied advocate, as HRD prove that having degrees doesn’t guarantee that you have a good vision of how the country will be benefited? Well, not going into the political matter, Smriti Irani’s credibility was questioned because she’s a woman, let alone be a not highly qualified one. But the critics failed to notice that India has been governed by a woman who is also not highly qualified, except of the fact that she happened to be married into India’s first family, for the past 2 decades.

What else can one expect from a world which has misunderstood the true essence of feminism? We do not want to be the superior race. All we want is respect!

Women in India have always been associated with household work. They are expected to live by the motto ‘of the family, for the family and by the family’. Why? Because that’s what we are made for. Women are always thought of as dependent, weak and submissive. Probably that’s the reason why it is so difficult for us to reach the top position in Corporate World (in any area for that matter). But have you ever taken some time from your self-absorbed lives and wondered why ,despite the cold shoulders offered at various stages, women are excelling in every field? Be it academics, social work or corporate- there’s no field we have left untouched. And still the people who work below us (or above us) expect us to end in kitchen.

See? This is exactly what I mean!

Let me share an incident with you to prove my point. Last year, during this time only when DU admissions were going on, a man came to SRCC with his 2 sons to seek admission. His son was short of 2 marks and he wanted the Principal to release a second list just to let his son in. We tried to make him understand that there are a lot of people, specially girls, who are short of 1 mark. Before your son we would have to give them admission, we said. His reply to our logical reasoning was : “Ladkiyan aati hi kyun hai yahan padhne? Nikaal do saari ladkiyon ko or Shri Ram ko all boys college bana do”.

What to expect now?

Simple, we want you to pay our bills. We want you to enjoy your life to the fullest while we are at home taking care of everyone. We want you to ignore our efforts of being the perfect one. And we want you to feel inferior if we turn out to be better than you. That’s all what we desire!
All I want to say is you are not right in thinking that women can have it all. No matter what the world preach, at the end of the day everyone wants the woman folk to go to the kitchen and make them a sandwich.

PS- Maybe I am wrong. Maybe women can have it all, in a parallel world maybe. Atleast I hope so.


8 thoughts on “The Other F- Word

  1. DI…..u may be right… there are many more examples….like the great scientists were men like Albert Einstein , Newton , and mathematicians Aryabhatta , Galileo…..and there are lot many examples that flash back in our minds but when it come for females then there are a few names like madam curie ,……..but there can be reasons behind this that in that times women were not given educaation , freedom….thats why they remain to kitchen ….bt in present days both girls and boys are given equal facilities ( exception for some areas ) …..then after a decade or two…..will there be a clear picture …..that women are suuperior or men?,… frm my point of view …..this question will never have a proper answer as both men and women have full capabilities to do all work ( exception for the special works )……so ….the main thing is…purifying our views and live like humans and not to discriminate on gender basis……

  2. I see a lot of anger in the words. Yes. You are right but only till some extent. Indian culture was started this way that men shall work and earn and let the women take care of the domestic chores. And those women took them as responsibilies and shakles. I agree that now times have changed but i guess most couldn’t stomach the change.

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